RedJen's Rearview Mirror

(Actually wrote this last night, then fell asleep on the keyboard and forgot to publish it...)

I spent the day in an odd place. The atmosphere was so different from where I’m moving from, that I had to stop and double check what I was seeing. Who would imagine a place where they have mandatory fun days once a month. You get an extra day off for your birthday,

Well, I survived the first week back in the office after being on vacation. The most common question asked this week was, “Where did you go?” When I responded by saying, “Nowhere,” most people just nodded in understanding. The second most common question was, “When is your transfer official?” This was an easier reply, since it is June 16th.

My office was moved yesterday and today. When the admin assistant put in the request to move my office, she only requested that my phone be moved, so when I got into my new office today I had a phone, but none of my stuff. After calling the space planning people, they arranged to have my things brought over. There were 3 boxes and a desk chair, so it wasn’t a lot that needed to be moved, but the chair in my new office was broken, so I REALLY wanted to get my chair. My stuff arrived at my new office at about 4:30 this afternoon. This explained why I didn’t feel an overwhelming need to get out of office today. I guess I was waiting for my stuff to arrive.

It is going to be interesting to see how things work out in my new assignment. This may turn out to be a really good move for me. On Wednesday I went with my Team Lead to a quick meeting to see some proposed tool upgrades and evidently asked insightful questions of the development team. I’m not sure if that was good or not, because the IT Lead for the development team looked me up in the corporate employee listing to see where I was transferring in from. I found this out at the end of another meeting I attended in place of my new Team Lead. My new manager was also there, so I was able to see her outside of her office. I think I’m going to like it here.

Expanding the membership of our BookClub (sent invitations to four new people)
Being happy with work (I know, it’s crazy)
Volleyball tournament (we got beat in the semifinals by the team that won)
Softball – Monday night we won 25 – 2 and they called the game at the end of the 5th inning. It’s too bad I couldn’t hit like this when I was a pre-teen.
Reading
Sleep is good :)

I must be getting old, because I think I threw out my elbow. It hurts terribly! We won the softball game, which was mercifully cut short after the fifth inning.

I’ve seen some funny things in my new building at work. On Monday, I realized I was walking behind someone who was clipping their fingernails as they walked down the hall. Today I saw a woman wearing a color pallet straight out of 1986. She was wearing a florescent, lime green shirt and crazy patterned leggings in florescent swirls of pink, blue, yellow and green on a black background.

New licensing fees to be associated with grocery lists seen as an unfair tax on the absent minded. The ACLU is said to be investigating.

Microsoft patents 'to-do' list
David Becker
CNET News.com
June 09, 2004, 12:05 BST

The software giant now has certain rights to 'task lists' in software-development environments

Better not get too fancy with your grocery list, now that Microsoft has patented a glorified form of the to-do list.

US Patent No. 6,748,582, granted and assigned on Tuesday to Microsoft, covers the use of a "task list" in a software-development environment.

The patented technology essentially integrates certain comments left in the source code of an application under development with an accompanying checklist. Leave a "TODO" comment in the source code, and an authoring application automatically creates an item in the task list. Check an item off on the task list, and the corresponding source code comment is changed.

A Microsoft representative did not immediately respond to a request for comment.

While the new patent is specific enough to software development that vacationers penning "what to pack" lists don't have to worry, it fits with Microsoft's ongoing efforts to enlarge its patent portfolio.

The company embarked on a campaign last year to generate more revenue from its intellectual-property portfolio and has since applied for hundreds of patents. The company has received patents covering everything from seemingly elementary aspects of computing technology, such as double-clicking, to arcana such as XML-scripting methods.

The software giant's patent push seemed to reach comical proportions earlier this year, when the company was accidentally granted a plant patent for a variety of apple tree.

(Link to the original story)

Based on the activities documented by ShaeSin at The Ranting Virgo, it would appear that Gateway is volunteering to join the list of Things that SUCK! Don’t you love when people volunteer for things?

Hopefully coming soon: "How ShaeSin got her groovy laptop back"

Certain people make me think way too much…

I'll admit very few people seem prepared to take on a commitment of next week. Unfortunately, it often seems like the concept of forever has been misplaced to them. I've always been told that "never is a mighty long time." It is sad when relationships that are traditionally meant to exist until death parts a couple have been reduced to the quality of a fast food meal.

I hate that I've grown somewhat more cynical. I often wonder whether or not a couple has realized the scope of what they are saying when they make vows of forever. Is it a case of saying, "Sure, I'll say that I'll love you until the end of our days, because it is romantic and it sounds good. I may even want to believe I'll love you for that long, but just in case I'm not blissfully happy, I can always just get a divorce." Having even one person in the relationship have that attitude before it begins does not bode well for the future strength of the mutual commitment.

Someone described being willing to take a chance on love as jumping off a cliff. The thing is that you expect to be jumping in tandem. If you jump and the other person hesitates, you are left freefalling alone and exposed. If your partner jumps and you hesitate, they are left in the vulnerable position. Even if you both jump, but you hesitate to see if your partner is really going to jump this time, you aren't jumping in tandem and unless you are willing to speed up your descent, trusting that they will embrace you when you are again at an even altitude, you can't be a pair until you are at the same place. Until you are both in the same place, someone is going to be hurt on impact with the ground, because the parachute only works when you activate it together. If you can't find the strength to be together, someone is going to hit the ground in a blaze of sudden deceleration trauma.

Personally, I'd rather be involved in a jump where both people put something on the line. I'm more likely to be the person who hesitates at the top of the cliff to make sure the other person is sure that they want to jump. That may be a test, I don't know, but until I can come up with a way to tether them so that if I jump they will either jump voluntarily or be drug off the side of the same cliff, I will probably retain some of my skepticism.

Do I believe in forever? Yes, I'd like to find someone who I could have that connection with. Someone who isn't afraid to contemplate the future before it happens and is willing to accept that because they are mortal there will come a time when it is time to move beyond the existence we currently experience.

Perhaps what we are seeing is an odd remake of courtly love. People know the words that they are supposed to say to make things sound right, but they never take the time to learn the melody. Rather than putting their heart into the words and taking what they are saying to heart, they recite the word by rout and pretend that is enough.

I want forever. I want to cry over the loss of a partner with whom I've built an entire lifetime of memories. I want a partner who would do the same if I were lost to them.

Until things get hard isn't good enough for me and I'm not willing to accept that.

You don’t get it. You don’t even get that you don’t get it. You think you have me figured out, but you have no idea what I want or who I am. You haven’t gotten the basics and since this is attempt number two, I have to say enough.

My time is valuable to me. I don’t have enough of it and when I give someone a block of time, I expect them to participate or if unable to meet, then call within a reasonable amount of time. Five hours after the fact is five hours wasted and not good enough. One way I show I care is by setting aside a specific block time. This isn’t me regulating people to appointments. This is me making sure that I can give someone my undivided attention. If something or someone isn’t worth my time, then I don’t waste the time.

Someone who respects me will respect that I put more emphasis on actions as opposed to words. I view saying something, but failing to follow through as the equivalent to lying. Pretty words may sound nice, but unless they are matched by actions, they leave a bitter taste and a feeling of disappointment.

Call me old-fashioned, but if I say I’ll do something or be somewhere, I will. I place a lot of personal value on not breaking promises. I view failing to follow through on commitments as breaking promises and I view making commitments that you have no intention of meeting as lying.

The truth can set you free and I have a high performance BS detector, also known as heightened intuition. If you can’t tell me the truth, at least don’t lie to me. You may think I believe you, but you’ll only succeed in showing me that you don’t value me.

In order for me to consider something a meaningful relationship, it has to have lasted for longer than two months. If the relationship is of a romantic nature and you don’t know anything personal about me, then it wasn’t meaningful. If you have to constantly question whether or not I’ll follow through with my word, you don’t know anything personal about me. If you cannot show minimal trust, you probably don’t expect people to trust you. If you don’t expect people to trust or rely on you, what motivates your actions to be worthy of trust?

Passive-aggressive pisses me off. Okay for your case this doesn’t apply, but I figure if I’m going to put out a list of the basics, I should include it. For the record, if you would like me to have to fight to keep from physically lashing out at something or yourself, this would be a good behavior to exhibit.

I believe that many things aren’t worth the energy it would take to be upset about them. If something isn’t important enough to be valuable to me, then it is definitely not important enough for me to be upset about. That being said, the people and things I view as important are definitely a finite list. These people have the power to cause me emotional pain, because I have let down my guard to them. If you would like to see what a vindictive and cold-hearted bitch I can be, do something hateful or harmful to one of those people. I tend to laugh when people try to piss me off. I get hard when people try to hurt those that I care about. If you would like me to hate you, then you have to earn my hate and it takes as much energy to earn my hate as it does to earn my love. That energy can be yours or someone else’s, but I refuse to hate things that have no bearing in my life.

So, I’m not mad, upset or sad. I’m disappointed that I gave you something (time) you didn’t value, but I gave it freely. I hope you find and recognize that which will make you happy. If I was on the list, I’m sorry, but no thanks.

RJ

Camera phone pictures from Christy's graduation and the trip there have been added to the Photo Album.

Well, I started to write a post, but I just erased it. You should thank me for that, I saved you from having to read the drivel I just wrote. So instead, here are a couple of amusing things that were on TV in the last hour.

From Without a Trace -
FBI Agent: What did you talk about?
Woman: Love, life, everything… It’s called friendship. It’s like therapy for poor people.

Kentucky Fried Chicken is running a special that features a "Collectible" bucket. From the video on the TV, it is just their regular bucket with a picture of Dale Earnhardt Jr. on the side.

We now have Collectible paper buckets. Who in their right mind collects greasy paper buckets?

And the cow was allowed to live another day.

I saw a reference to the Gender Genie on So Anyway today as I was doing my daily journal browsing. I was curious because it says that it can guess your gender based on how you write. There is more about this theory at nature.com.

I put all of my Musing entries though the Gender Genie individually and then as a single entry. Yeah, I’m an engineer and I need data. My results came back as follows:

Of 35 individual Musing entries: 7 female, 27 male and 1 unable to determine.

When I entered the text off all 35 entries at one time: Male

After seeing this, I remembered a comment ShaeSin made last summer after Desufnoc and I took an online quiz that is meant to determine how being Right/Left Brain dominant plays a roll in your personality. ShaeSin was commenting on our results and mentioned that if someone were to read our results, which we agreed were pretty accurate, it would be easy to think I was male and he was female. To see if Gender Genie would get the same impression, I had Desufnoc’s entry from yesterday analyzed.

Bottom line: Gender Genie thinks I’m a guy and Desufnoc is a girl.

Well, I was planning on doing house projects today anyway, but I hadn’t planned on them being quite so timely. My air conditioner has decided that it is tired. The good news is that while tired, it still works, so as long as I give it a break now and then, it is fine. The timely part of my house projects being that I’m going to attempt to put in a few screen windows and install a retractable screen door out onto the deck. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that the AC unit will hold out until Friday, I had already scheduled to have it cleaned, so hopefully that is all it needs and the 100 degree plus heat index of the last few days has just been taxing it.

Things to remember all day:
Eat
Drink
Sunscreen

Projects for the day:
Measure windows (check – 31 x 61 & 28 x 71)
Make lemonade.
Vacuum the living room.
Vacuum the steps and upstairs.
Run Errands:
> Sears - cordless drill/screwdriver & lawn trimmer
> Home Depot - window screening kit & filters for AC unit
> If there is room in the car, stop at Bed, Bath & Beyond - bed desk & half chair.
Install retractable screen.
Install screens for bedrooms.
Install screens for living room.
Remove debris from the last set of thunderstorms from the lawn.
Mow & edge the lawn.
*Rework distribution of labor.
Email pen pal

Well, it will be 10:00 AM by the time I get this posted, so I should probably get working on this list if I hope to get the lawn mowed while there is still some light outside.

*There is something seriously amiss when it is my roommate’s parents that are supposed to be visiting and I’m the one doing all the pre-visit prep work. Don’t get me wrong, the installations are definitely my tasks, but what good is having a teenager if they don’t mow the lawn? (Please note, there is ZERO angst associated with the last sentence and I will kick anyone who tries to make it seem like there is. Said teenager has not been asked to vacuum the carpets or do anything with the lawn. In fact, she has done a wonderful job of taking up the task of keeping the dishwasher contents on a fairly regular schedule. Her doing that is great, because I always forget to take the dishes out once they are clean and end up just putting things in the sink until I’m forced to empty the dishwasher in order to wash the dishes. She pays her rent without being prompted and is generally nice to be around.)

Except for writing my pen pal and installing the screen door, the inside tasks are finished. Eve’s nieces are downstairs. I wonder if I could borrow them to go pick up sticks out in the yard. I may try and install the screen door tonight, but it takes two people, because one has to hold the housing against the doorframe for part of the installation. The house looks pretty good.

If you haven’t figured it out, today is Father’s Day. This year I celebrated by hitting the Father’s Day sale at Sears and buying myself power tools (a drill/driver, a bit set and a trimmer/edger). Look Dad, I have real tools. I can’t wait to try out the drill and see what kind of havoc I can wreck with it.

So to my favorite dads (mine, my brother Pete and my godfather Jim) and all the other fathers out there, Happy Father’s Day.

The world news lately has been saddening. It is hard for me to imagine what the hostages’ families are going through. I saw tonight that four marines were killed and the last I saw the location of the bodies was known, but they had not been able to be recovered yet. I worry about the turn over of power at the end of the month. I really hope that the people will embrace the idea of ruling themselves, but I fear that they will fall back into a pattern of allowing the strongest arm to run the country, regardless of the will or good of the people. Rereading that sounds funny to me. Here is the United States going in and taking over and I’m saying the people may fall back into a pattern of allowing the strong arm to take control. It isn’t like they know anything else.

Sigh - the air conditioning is back on.

Once upon a time, there was a group of friends. They were a small, tight knit group who shared a common bond. While not always apparent, to a one, they all thought too much. During the high times when the group was tightest, there was never any doubt where they could be found. Each could be found with the others and together the rest of the world wondered where such people came from.

Then strife arrived in small forms. Harsh words were spoken and friend attacked friend. Battle lines were drawn and sides were taken. Those once called friend became known as Evil and avoided by some. The friends able to bridge the chasm that separated the group would travel back and forth, but no one worked to close the gap. Some who initially tried to keep contact with both sides were quietly cut off and forced away from the far side.

Eventually, the group appeared to heal and go on, but under the surface, a disquiet lurked and began to fester. People who think too much without expressing themselves easily feel cut off from others. Invisible walls began to take shape and while easily seen through, the strength of the walls was deceptive. Once created, the walls began growing thicker until their transparency failed and looking through them showed a distorted vision. People once friends became unfamiliar and foreign. The warmth, once easily felt from one to the other could not melt the walls and there was grief for what had been lost.

Each tried to break down the walls, but could not find the strength to do so alone. The task required that all focus their strength on a single point together, but those who strived were never able to but aside their pain and hurt to work fully together at the same time. Unable to break down the barriers between them, grief turned to resentment and depression. Those once too strong to separate fell broken and bleeding.

Time passed and some wounds began to heal. A few defined new lives and started to live again. Some searched for ways to recreate that which had been lost. Some cried alone. And some cried feeling lonely and unable to reach the ones they cared so deeply about.

More time passed and new sparks arrived in the world. A fresh breeze that gave life to the group and rekindled flames that had long died into lonely embers. The breeze became a tornado and all in its wake were tossed about like discarded toys. The storm passed and together bonds began to re-forge.

Unknown to the rest, the breeze remembered the power of the storm and longed to return to that place. Focused on regaining the power of the storm, the breeze took from all gathered until only a single man remained who saw the gentle breeze behind the gale. Fearing the man would soon see past the breeze, the gale led him away from the others and fought off any who would come near. Away from the growing gale, others watched and yearned for the man to see beyond the storm filled air, but he was deaf to all cries and blinded by the wind.

And the storm moves on, carrying the slumbering man away from those who care for him and striking blindly out at any who would follow to try and awaken him. Those left battered by the storm fall exhausted from the task of surviving. They look from one to the other with tired eyes full of sorrow for the lost and gather their strength. Soon it will be time to survey the chaos left by the storm and those left must decide what is lost and what can be rebuilt. For now it is time to sleep, tomorrow will be soon enough to begin sorting through the pieces. Some pieces will be cherished, others cried over, but all will have to find a new place.

Now comes the rain to wash the raw burns of an unforgiving wind and lull the tired eyes into a healing sleep. And the tired sleep, dreaming of a gentle rain and as the sun rises, a ray of warmth creates a rainbow of hope.

A Tale of woe from another Zanuc victim:

At the end of July '04, I will have moved the last site from their server to another hosting company.

On with the story...

About mid April 2003, with the limited knowledge of web hosting companies, I selected Zanuc to host the web page I was setting up. They were selected because of the following criteria:
1) 800 phone number
2) Pricing
3) Support promised (accessibility)
4) They are located in North Carolina (I wanted a US company)
I took out the plastic and setup the account. The automated reply contained this information:

As this was my first public web site with a hosting company, I entered my personal information for the account, not knowing that my name was used for the directory. I requested that changed via email. They ignored the first email, but responded to the second email. The second email was worded as reply or close this account that was created a few days ago.

They replied and changed the directory name. May 1st, the web page was resolving. The reply email was verbally sparse. I requested more information. Again, two emails and a reply or close the account message to get the information I requested.

Then came this message:

I thought, there is the problem, it was fixed, let's move on. I wanted to set up a second web site, and requested information on the process BEFORE I did something incorrectly. I received a reply without having to send a second email. Ah, they did get it fixed. I set up the second web site account. I get an emailed invoice:

Where did the 800 number go??? I tried calling - I think there was an answer machine. That started a "concern" (flag going up). I wasn't having problems with the site at that time.

Later, the email request kept timimg out on the server for the hosted site. That's how I knew to check it out and that something was wrong. But no 800 number - I sent an email. This email was sent back, but not as a reply.

The second account had the directory name "problem" also, but since it was never seen by the public, it didn't matter. After the second request, I get back:

Ah! The 800 number is there, but a machine still answers. No more problems arose, so I setup another web site (that's three). Later, the 800 number is now closed down. I couldn't get the site submission option in the control panel for the site, to send information to search engines. I sent an email - reply - they are working on it.
One day, all web sites went down (this was the second time). Emailed support:

(That's twice the hosting server went down. I had to notify them to get it back up.)

Email was getting some response (not every time), challenges seem to be
resolved, the web sites were staying up, most of the time.

One month prior the one year anniversary, I get an email that requested
me to:

Following that link and following the instructions would have resulted in additional funds for the domain registration, that Zanuc included in the initial six month subscription, and the following six month subscription.
I had previously sent a few emails about another issue and the response was not there. Soon after that, another email server message error had came out.

This is getting old, lame, whatever term you use for it.

I sent an email requesting the same rates I was paying to continue having them host the web sites. No reply. Sent another after two days.

No reply.

As the date for closing an account was at hand, I sent an email from home and from the modern billing web page requesting that my account be closed, all prepaid sites continue to be hosted to the end of the prepaid period with no renewal. This request was sent with plenty of time outside that stated in the FAQ section of the web site to close an account. I NEVER received another reply or acknowledgment from them again, no matter how many emails I sent. They are continuing to send me invoices for the sites that have expired subscription. I have sent emails via the Modern Billing system on the web (this is hosted by their server, right?) to update and correct the information - no reply (except for the automated "we received your email") or correcting of the invoicing to date.

They didn't even give the courtesy of a reply. I agree, as a past subscriber, ZANUC SUCKS!!!!

1) Consistent disregard for the customer
2) Servers that apparently cannot deliver email or webmail to support
3) Server that fail, and you have to notify them that the server is down and needs attention.

YOU HAVE BEEN EDUCATED!!!!!

What I want:

I want the invoicing to stop, as requested on several occasions, and close the account as requested on several occasions. Click the mouse!!!

Robert

There I was, sitting on the couch and minding my own business. I got up to give Neko her evening snack before heading off to bed. As I was walking back toward the living room I heard, "don't spit tongue bits on me" coming from the other end of the couch.

"Don't spit tongue bits on me." - Eve, June 29, 2004