RedJen's Rearview Mirror

When March comes in like a lion, it goes out like a lamb… Wait a minute, where did April, May and June go?

I’m on vacation and I don’t have any plans. That’s a new switch for me. At some point, I need to arrange to get my sister back to Ohio. I should work on that, my parents might like to know when to expect her. If the weather holds, we will be going to a water park with my friend and her younger sister next week.

I’ve been wanting to buy a house, but I’ve been reluctant to go in and talk to the bank about my chances for getting a mortgage. Caution: credit cards in college are bad. Too bad they weren’t so open about that when I was in school. Lets just say the hole I dug myself into wasn’t small and my credit report was quite ugly for a while. On the positive side, I have successfully paid off all my credit cards from school and automated draft is a wonderful thing for bills (like student loans) that are the same amount every month and are due on the same day. Anyway, I’ve been reluctant to consider if I could buy a house now, because I didn’t want to deal with the rejection. I’ve been watching my credit report and steadily paying things off, hoping to get my FICO score up to 700 and then I was going to go to the bank. See I was under the impression that you needed something that high before you could get a loan that large.

On a whim, I was looking at sites for first time home buyers and found a place that asked you rate your FICO as Excellent, Good, Average, Fair or Poor. I know the score itself, but I wasn’t sure which category it fell under. Luckily, this site had a FAQ that said if your score is from X – Y, then your score is Excellent, Good, Average, Fair or Poor. The picture I got from this was a lot brighter than what I was assuming.

So I figured what the heck, the site offered to send me information so I said okay. They also sent me the name of a Loan Consultant in my area that specialized in first time home purchasers. I’m meeting with her later today to look at my options. It’s kind of cool to think that I may be able to have my own house, stop dealing with renting, be able to paint the walls colors that I like and even manage to get a bit of a tax break from Uncle Sam. I know there are other costs associated with having a house, but I lived in the same house from the time I came home from the hospital, until I left for college. Knowing where the house is going to be next year is something that is very comforting to me.

So this next week, I’ll be sleeping, reading, going to Ohio at some point and maybe something else. I’m taking it easy. Maybe I’ll drag Rugrat around and look at some houses. I’ve suggested taking her up to Ohio a little early and then going to Cedar Point to check out the new roller coaster, but so far she hasn’t been real keen on the idea. She isn’t a roller coaster nut and I think she likes it down here. I like having her down here. As she gets a little older, I hope she still wants to come down during the summer. I’ll definitely miss her more if she doesn’t.

The trip to the loan counselor appears to have gone really well. I’ll officially hear back from her on Monday, but it looks like I’m going to be house shopping. It’s exciting, scary and a bit overwhelming all at the same time.

Vacation Day 1: slept in, went to the pool, had a picnic, got a slight sunburn, finished reading Harry Potter, played with sparklers, watched a movie, read another short book

Got a full eight hours sleep, woke up long enough to feed the critters, went back to sleep for a couple hours, read a little, surfed the net a bit, chatted with a few friends, took Rugrat, Invention and another friend to see Legally Blonde 2, dinner out with the girls and Invention’s parents, slumber party at my place, added 3 books to the Book Reviews page, reformatted the Haiku page, caught up on some email

Went to sleep around 3:30 AM, when the girls finally started to slow down, woke up at 8:00 with a request from Omega to feed the critters, quickly went back to sleep, hid from the girls in my room until about 12:30, took the girls swimming, dinner and book club meeting at Bogarts

Sleeping in seems to be a common theme…

Hang out with the girls until lunch time, took the girls out and discovered where all the moms gather during the summer (Chick-fil-a), met with a realtor to start the house hunt, dropped the girls off so they could swim while I started looking at houses, hung out with some friends…

Tomorrow: Water Park

Water Park – Sun, fun and temporary tattoos

After spending 8 hours going in and out of houses, I ended back up at the second house I saw on Monday. I enlisted the adult eyes of a friend to take a look at it and brought my sister over to take a look at it. So far so good, now I have to last through the offer, contract and closing.

Target acquired, House Hunt complete.

In case there was any doubt, house hunting is exercise…

And now the real fun begins, hurry up and wait. The current owner is waiting for his realtor to call him back. The owner's realtor is waiting on my realtor to call him back. My realtor is waiting on me to call her back. I’m waiting on my mortgage broker to call me back.

...the house that Jack built.

My mortgage broker (TH) called back. I’ve put her in touch with my realtor (XC). They now get to talk today and fax things to each other. I have a list of papers that I need to get to TH next week. And even before getting off the phone, I’m in wait mode once again…

* In case anyone is worried, I go back to work on Monday, so I won’t be able to deliver blow-by-blow updates at all hours of the day. Well, at least I’ll have to do work in between. : )

Sleep in late, an afternoon bubble bath, mac & cheese, followed by lazar tag, go-carts and put-put.

Think? On vacation, I don’t think so…

I made an initial offer this morning. They countered, I countered back and they accepted! I am floating! I can’t believe this is happening and boy is it happening fast. I now have a closing date and the inspections are scheduled.

There is a “fly in the ointment”. My mortgage broker, TH, has been less then helpful. So far she’s promised to call on Monday and didn’t. She was supposed to call on Wednesday and didn’t. I called her on Thursday and she did call back, but then didn’t get XC the pre-qualification letter Thursday evening. In fact, she didn’t get XC the letter until Friday afternoon, after XC called again to request it. TH has had nothing but excuses. I told her when we met, that as long as I was happy with her work that I didn’t see any reason to look for another lender. Well, she didn’t call on Monday or Wednesday, she didn’t get XC the letter on Thursday. I began questioning whether or not TH was going to have my best interests in mind.

I am old enough now to know you are not perfect.
I am old enough now to understand that you always did your best.
I am old enough now to recognize that personal growth doesn’t stop.
I am old enough now to admit I still strive for your approval.

What a conundrum I must have been to a young first time father.
I was never sure how to reach you, but I always knew you would protect me.
When I wanted to play catch, I wish you had played only with me.
When my friend died, you held me as I cried.
You taught me how to drive on ice (I can never thank you enough for that).
You were there to strengthen me when my crazed ex-boyfriend climbed our house.

You taught me by example.
You taught me to be strong.
You taught me to honor my word.
You taught me to keep my commitments.
You taught me that personal convictions matter.
You taught me to protect those I love.

It is you that I fear letting down, should I fall.
I can see much of your character in me.
I am taller now, but your arms are still the safest place I know.

Here is to 100 entries!

TH and I have been exchanging email. I sent her one yesterday in response to her phone message. If you are interested in reading the soap opera, read on...

Contracts signed, mortgage applied for, inspections scheduled, closing date set and insurance company informed of purchase. Now I need to remember to officially notify my apartment complex that I will not be staying in my apartment once the lease runs out before July 30th.

No word more word from TH... I wonder if she decided she was losing that battle...

Work:
I am persona evil at work today. Security rules for applications are getting tightened up and I am one of the lucky people who get to badger people to fill out the surveys on the applications they own. I sent a TON of email yesterday and today to about 1000 people to either follow the rules by Friday or I’d delete their applications on Monday. I haven’t answered my phone since before noon. The last time I checked my messages I had 15 pieces of phone mail and about 50 emails from people going, “Yikes, don’t take my stuff away!”

Most people have been nice about it, but I can only answer the same question so many times with "the answers to all the questions are in the screen shots in the email you received" before I start to be convinced that people no longer know how to read. There are people with real questions, which I don't mind, but I have very little tolerance for people who can't help themselves out of a wet paper bag when they have been given a flashlight and map.

House
Inspection for the soon to be my house is tomorrow morning. I’m going to take my camera with me and get some pictures of it. I’ve had a lot of people ask to see pictures, but so far I haven’t gotten off of work in time to get there before dark this week.

Website
I added a "Contact RedJen" link to the main page of this site. I was told the one I had on the Disclaimer page was a little too hidden. So I'm not hiding, here I am. I also fixed the graphics on the Interests page. I had deleted a directory that was left over from an old layout, but I'd forgotten that I had used one of the gifs.

A picture of the house can be seen on the Photo Album page.

A larger collection of house pictures can be found on Photo Page 10

Today I’ll be taking my sister back home to our parents. I’ll either get to meet my new nephew or hug his mom if he hasn’t decided to arrive yet. I’m also expecting to get the details from the home inspection that was done yesterday on the house I’m looking to buy. I don’t think the kid is packed yet. Getting to the airport should be interesting today. When my parents brought her down, they drove, so they didn’t worry about how many bags she brought with her. I’ll probably end up getting out all of my suitcases and packing her bags into them in order to avoid paying extra fees for too many checked bags at the airport.

Back to work, I need to finish a report and get packed myself for the trip. Hopefully I’ll be able to get all my stuff in a single gym bag.

After a short, but nice visit north, I’ve returned home. I didn’t get to see my one sister, who was in a play over the weekend, but I did get to see the rest of my siblings. My nephew hasn’t decided to make his appearance as of yet. I did manage to leave Rugrat with our parents, so I am no longer playing single parent.

Now I look around and see my apartment and everything that needs straightened up. It would appear that when working a “normal” week, I don’t have enough drive to stay on top of the cleaning for a teenager and myself. Time to make a list in order to get back on top of things.

I’ve gotten back the summary from the inspection I had done on the house. There are some things that need to be addressed, but nothing that immediately makes me say “I’m not going to go ahead with the purchase.” What it will come down to next is whether or not the current owners are willing to fix the things identified. Someone asked me today if I could walk away from the house. I had to think about it for a moment, but the answer is yes, I can walk away and start looking all over again. I’d rather not, but I could do it. I think that’s part of the reason I haven’t turned in my notice at my apartment complex yet. I have until next Wednesday to do it and I want to see what the owners say about the findings in the inspector’s report. If they aren’t going to fix things, I may need my apartment for an extra month.

The Good
We now have a manager.
He understands why I am currently frustrated.
He appears open to helping to untangle the mess surrounding my project.
He didn’t try to blow smoke up my butt.
He made time to meet with me when I needed his assistance, instead of putting my off until it was convenient.
Stress level slipping…
I should be an aunt tomorrow.

The Bad
“Official” Team Lead on vacation
He didn’t get the information to our 2nd line manager that he was supposed to.
Apparently I am his de facto backup, but he didn’t let me know about any meetings that I need to attend.
The original project schedule we agreed upon will not happen, due to circumstances, we are not as far along as we wanted to be at this point and a key resource is going to be on vacation for 2 weeks.

My brother and sister-in-law welcomed Brett Allen into the world last night at 7:02 PM. He arrived 20.5 inches long and 7 lbs 15 ounces. By all accounts, he has 10 toes, 8 fingers, 2 thumbs, brown hair with a red tinge and blue eyes with brown streaks so we’ll have to see what color they turn out to be.

Baby & new Daddy

Now if only he had decided to make his appearance last Saturday, I could have met him while I was up in Ohio. For now I’ll have to hope his parents send me more pictures until I can make the trip back up.

With thanks to Sonia for providing the link to Blog Candy.

Blog Candy - day 1
1. What was the last book you read? Watchmen by Alan Moore
2. What was the last film you watched? League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
3. What was the last gadget you bought? Sport Headphone
4. Where was your last holiday? July 2003 - At my apartment, I went house shopping. July 2002 – Disney World (Orlando, Florida)
5. What was the last tape/CD you bought? Hard Candy by Counting Crows

Blog Candy - day 2
Name ten (material) things on your wishlist.
* New House (In process)
* Stand up mixer
* Refrigerator
* Dining room furniture
* Living room furniture
* Piano
* Library furniture
* Hall table
* Deck furniture
* Decorating books/magazines

Blog Candy - day 3
Name your favorites....
* Soft drink – Raspberry Ginger ale
* Color – Blue/Green
* Film – Yankee Doodle Dandy
* Painting – The Starry Night by Vincent van Gogh
* Fruit - Pineapple
* Radio station – No real favorite
* Clothes shop - Nordstrom
* Item of jewelry – toe rings
* Online store - Amazon
* Beauty product – Silk Therapy

Just for fun!
1. Coke or Pepsi? Coke
2. Internet Explorer or Netscape? Netscape
3. Tissues or handkerchiefs? Tissues
4. Optimist or pessimist? Optimist in a bad situations, pessimist in good situations
5. Rock or pop? Rock
6. Fiction or non-fiction? Fiction
7. Butter or margarine? Butter
8. Gold or silver? Gold & Silver combinations
9. Tea or coffee? Neither
10. Peanut butter or chocolate spread? Peanut butter

I’ve been awake all week, today I’ve just wanted to sleep. I been working from home and I kept nodding off over my computer. Its like my brain was used up the first four days of the week and now it is rebelling. Come to think of it, that’s how it used to be before the darkness came into things. Work is crazy, but that’s okay. I was going to take a nap this morning, but that was foiled by pesky work and the telephone. Tomorrow is Saturday, so I’ll get to sleep in before anything else happens. I think my cats have the right idea, they are all stretched out enjoying sunbeams.

Word association day
Rabbit - bunny
Yogurt - yuck
Special - hug
Friend - talking
Ill - tired
Fountain pen - ink
Teacher - math
Artistic - expression
Money - house
Happy - content

I’ve decided that I really want to keep my Musings entries to what is going on around me or inside the confines of my thoughts. As I’ve found that I like playing with some of the random memes that occur out her in cyberspace, I’ve created a new space to keep memes, surveys and whatnot. Predictably, it is called RedJen’s Memes. So that’s part of what I did this morning, that and sleeping in. Sleep is good.

I’ve never claimed to go to church as often as I know I should. Part of that has to do with not quite being able to find the atmosphere that I associate with a congregation. I’m sure a lot of this has to do with my previous experiences being the church I grew up in, where my parents were married, I was baptized and have received all my sacraments to this point. Being a part of a church where you family is already established makes it easier on an introvert. Just being a part of my family gave me inclusion into things without too much fear of awkward situations. Okay, so they wouldn’t let me join the Boy Scouts, but that discussion never left the kitchen and since my dad was the Scout Master, I didn’t really need to join the troop to learn how to pitch a tent, tie a knot or build a fire.

1. Your name backwards? Refinnej
2. Your parent's birthplace? Not sure
3. Last download? Software update
4. Favorite restaurant? Bogart’s
5. Last swim in a pool? July 8, 2003
6. Ever been in a school play? Yes
7. How many kids do you want? 2-3
8. Type of music you dislike most? Shock metal
9. Registered to vote? Yes
10. Have cable? Yes
11. Ever ridden a moped? Yes
12. Ever prank call anyone? Yes
13. Ever get a parking ticket? Yes
14. Would you bungee jump or skydive? Yes
15. Furthest place you've traveled? California
16. Have a garden? No
17. Favorite comic strip? Dilbert
18. Know all the words to your National Anthem? Yes
19. Bath or shower? Shower
20. Best movie seen in last month? Finding Nemo
21. Favorite pizza topping? Pineapple
22. Chips or popcorn? Popcorn
23. Color of lipstick usually worn? Raspberry
24. Ever smoked peanut shells? No
25. Ever been in a beauty pageant? No
26. Orange juice or apple juice? Orange juice
27. Last person you went to dinner with, and where? Rugrat, 42nd Street Oyster Bar
28. Favorite chocolate bar? Snickers
29. Last time you voted? Fall 2002
30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato? Don’t know
31. Ever won a trophy? Yes
32. Are you a good cook? Yes
33. Can you pump your own gas? Yes
34. Ever order an article from an infomercial? No
35. Sprite or Seven Up? 7-Up
36. Ever had to wear a uniform to work? Yes
37. Last thing you bought at a pharmacy? Tweezers
38. Ever throw up in public? Yes
39. Prefer to be a millionaire or find true love?
40. Believe in love at first sight? Yes
41. Ever call a 1-900 number? No
42. Can ex's be friends? Sometimes
43. Last person you visited in hospital? Mom (she works in one)
44. Did you have a lot of hair as a baby? Yes
45. Answering machine message? “Hi, this is Jen. I can’t take you call right now, but if you leave your name and number, I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.”
46. Favorite 'Saturday Night Live' character? Church Lady
47. Name of first pet? Scamper (Sam doesn't count, I don't remember him at all.)
48. Contents of your purse? Check book, compact, lip gloss, nail clippers, change, a couple receipts, member shopping cards and 2 pens
49. Favorite thing to do before bedtime? Read
50. One thing you are grateful for today? I get to sleep in on Saturdays

Favorites:
Author – George R.R. Martin
Dessert – Crème Brule
Crisp/chip flavor – Sour cream & onion
Gemstone - Emerald
Shop – the Museum Store
Animal - Cat
Color to wear – Black/Red
Cake – Angel food
Yogurt flavor - none
Perfume - Pleasures

There are people you can quietly chat with after a long day or week, then softy drift off to sleep. And there are some people you can just sit and talk with for hours and never run out of things to say.

1. How old are you? 31
2. How many different schools did you go to? 4
3. How long have you known your oldest friend? 13 years
4. How many emails do you get every day? 50 – 100 non-spam emails
5. What is on your mousepad? The Ohio State University Symbol
6. What was the last thing you drank? Raspberry Crystal Lite
7. What is the first thing you do in the morning? Feed the cats
8. Who was the last person you spoke to? The check out lady at the grocery store
9. What is your favorite film? Yankee Doodle Dandy
10. Where was your last holiday? July 2003 - At my apartment, I went house shopping.

I was much more comfortable with the idea of having a housecat (or three) as a totem animal. Well, it would appear that they are around, but as relative and representative of another feline, the lion. It isn’t much wonder that the female lions have so much strength that they represent feminine power. This is going to take some time to fully grasp, but here is some of what I’ve found so far:

1. What's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to you? Taking a moonlight walk across a bridge.
2. What's the most important thing that happened to you last year? My youngest sister came to live with me for a month.
3. What do you consider your best skill? Negotiating toward a common positive solution.

Shall I be less than the woman I am to make another happy? It is almost comical at this point to realize that is exactly what someone has asked of me. My eyes are open to the barbs that are being covered in rose petals and handed to me. I’ve heard too many different versions of the same events from him at this point to doubt that he is deliberately withholding information from me in an effort to make it impossible for me to be effective.

I have fought long and hard (often internally with my own demons) to gain the skills that I have learned. I can now see that many of the frustrating things I have seen recently encountered have been a result of his insecurities.

I suppose that he has reason to fear that his skills are in doubt. I’m not the only one who has been brought in to ensure that things happen. The amount of things I was able to move forward while he was out of the office and unable to withhold information was actually quite impressive. Funny, I was able to move 3 projects significantly forward when I was privy to all the information, not just the watered down and altered information he usually feeds me. So now I’ll be double-checking my information and using all my sources, since I can’t trust him to be forthcoming with me.

I won’t be put into his comfortable box and he’s going to find that out one way or the other. If he would like to insist on trying to put me there, he’ll find that I do have claws. I’m not afraid of his bluster, he can try and puff himself up all he likes, but he’s still a little man afraid that I will surpass him. According to him, he’s getting older and doesn’t want to be a worker-bee for the rest of his career. That’s not my problem and it’s not my job to make his career easy for him. It’s a little late to begin trying to start leading a charge when the rest of the cavalry has already passed you on the way to the objective.

Sorry, I’m not willing to go back to being just a worker-bee, content to accept someone else’s view of the world around me and take orders without question any longer. I’m too good at influencing the big picture to shut up and take orders. I’ve had my hand the helm of the ship. I don’t have to be the captain of the ship, but I’m too valuable to be put below deck and forced to control the rat population. I’m sure there is something up on deck that can be improved by leveraging the power of the rats rather than killing them outright.

I’ve lost my white flag, so if he would like to try and force me back into grunt work because he’s afraid of me, he can try. He may be afraid of my strength, but I’m not, it’s mine and I’m no longer afraid to use it. I may not like conflict, but I’m not afraid of it and I don’t play to lose.

They are sealing the parking lot in my apartment complex and when I got up this morning to go to the gym, I found my car completely blocked in. Unfortunately, since I’m block in, this mean I can’t go into the office early today and get a jump on office things, but I’ll have to settle for cleaning up my email until one of the three cars boxing me in moves.

1. Cats or dogs? Cats
2. Cereal or toast? Cereal
3. Still or sparkling water? Still
4. Pink or red? Red
5. Wine or beer? Wine
6. Comedy or drama? Either
7. TV news or newspaper? Newspaper
8. Black or white? Black
9. PC or Mac? PC
10. Wallpaper or paint? Paint

I've been set free to go to work. What kind of an oxymoron is that?

The seller has agreed to make all the suggested repairs from the house inspection. No haggling or anything, just an “Okay, the repairs will be done by August 11th”. I've been told this is an unusual occurrence, but it works for me.

If only birds with nice voices were permitted to sing in the forrest,
it would be a quiet place.

Tonight, I am going to leave the electronics behind and read. Maybe I'll go out on the porch with the kitties. Maybe I'll stretch out on the couch or in my room. Tonight, I will be quiet.

1. What are the three biggest shocks you've ever had?
a) Finding out my mom was pregnant during my senior year of High School
b) Being named “Youth of the Year” by the local Knights of Columbus.
c) Finding out my aunt has cancer

2. What were the three best days of your life?
a) When I paid off my last college credit card
b) When I signed the contract to buy my house
c) Any day at the beach

3. What were the three saddest days of your life?
a) The funeral of a friend
b) When paternal grandfather died
c) Officially ending a six year relationship